As I laid there trying to get back to sleep, a lot of thoughts crossed my mind. I wondered if this was going to be "labor day" and if so, why hadn't anyone ever described contractions to me as feeling like menstrual cramps. I also stressed out about not having my bags packed yet. I still didn't know what I wanted to wear to and from the birth center. Honestly though, being eight days away from my due date I really didn't think I was having real contractions. If anything I thought I might be having Braxton Hicks and at one point I even thought maybe I had food poisoning. I never experienced Braxton Hicks throughout my pregnancy and didn't really know what they felt like. In addition, I had not had a bloody show yet and my water had not broke either. Besides that, everyone knows that it is very common for first time moms to go into labor until at least their due date at the earliest. I had already envisioned myself on several occasions giving birth on Labor Day :-) Knowing this, I really tried to relax and go back to the sleep, but what I was calling menstrual type cramps seemed to be getting stronger as I lay there. I think I even nudged Constant again and protested that these contractions may be real looking for some sort of dramatic reaction. I decided to get up out of bed and walk around the house a bit. We learned in our Bradley Class that there were a couple of things that we could do to stop false labor if that in fact was what I was having. Keeping these things in mind from around 6 AM to 8AM, I walked around a bit, tried to eat something, took a shower and even tried to go back to sleep. None of these things seemed to work at all and the contractions were becoming regular and were lasting longer. I had visited the bathroom at least five more times over this period of time and the toast that I ate didn't stay in my system very long. In hindsight, I realized that my body was cleaning itself out.
At this point it was around 8:30 AM and even though I tried to convince Constant to go to work and that I would be fine, he refused to go to work and convinced me that it was time that he called the midwife to tell her that I was having contractions. He had wanted to call her several times before but every time he went to call her I broke down and cried. I was upset for two reasons. I did not want to be a dramatic first time mom and was upset that if I wasn't really in labor that I would be bothering my midwife and It finally it him me that I was scared to be in labor. A part of me thought that if we did not call the midwife than I wouldn't really be in labor.
Needless to say, Constant didn't listen to me and called my midwife. My midwife told Constant that is sounded like I was in the "putsy, putsy" stage of labor and to call her back around 1pm.
From around 9 AM to about 11AM my contractions became really intense and I had an incredibly difficult time relaxing and using any of the techniques that I had learned in my Bradley Class to handle or ease the pain. Because of that, I got really upset with myself and started to feel really out of control. Not knowing how long I was going to be in labor I was really upset that I wasn't going to be able to handle the pain for much longer. I remember thinking that people had lied to me about labor and contractions. I had understood it that I would have relief in between each contraction, but my contractions were right on top of each other. I honestly didn't know how I was going to have a natural childbirth. I tried to relax in bed and focus on an object on the wall, but laying in bed was extremely painful and I could not tolerate the pain. Anything that Constant tried to do or say to help relieve the pain or help me relax did not work AT ALL. I repeat, did not help AT ALL. I am surprised he's still alive to be honest :-)
Constant had been timing my contractions using a blackberry contraction application. The application "notified" him that I should go to the hospital because I had been having contractions regularly for over an hour that were less than four minutes apart lasting for a minute. Also, noticing that my emotional sign posts" indicated that I was further along than we thought, he decided to call the midwife. My midwife said that I was clearly in labor and that we should come into the birth center. Shortly after the call, I got my "bloody show" and partially started to believe that I was in real labor.
At this point, I was in so much pain that I seriously thought about having the baby at home.Emotionally, I would describe myself as pretty much being an out of control, but was able to some how pack the final things up that I needed and make my way to the car. For those of you wondering, at this point, I really didn't give a shit about what I wore to the birth center nor what I was going to wear home :-). It also didn't bother me that I wasn't able to cover up the bags under my eyes prior to leaving the house. The thought of driving a half hour to the birth center was horrific to me and let me tell you the ride was the most horrific ride I have ever experienced. We didn't even make it off of Red Squirrel Lane when I declared to Constant that I hated our car.
The ride to the birth center was horrific like I mentioned. Not only was the ride itself horrific, but the weather was horrific as well. It was easily in the high 80's and was humid as all hell.
We arrived to the birth center around noon. Everything was so surreal to me. I had been to the birth center countless times, but still couldn't believe that it was my time to have a baby. My midwife was already filling the birthing tub when we arrived because she knew that I had wanted to labor in the tub for pain management purposes.
My midwife checked me to see how far along I was. She said that I was 4 cm's dilated and 100% effaced. I was certain that my progress had digressed in the car and thought for certain that I was more than 4cm's dilated. Needless to say, I hopped into the birthing tub and felt immediate relief. The heat was awesome, but the relief was pretty brief. I became pretty overwhelmed by the heat from the tub coupled by the fact that it was so hot out that day.
After about 15 to 20 mins of being in the tub, I felt the strong urge to go to the bathroom. In between contractions I managed to get out of the tub and walk to the bathroom. I labored in the bathroom for about 20 mins or so. For whatever reason I "enjoyed" laboring on the toilet as I felt safe. The contractions were really intense at this point and I remember not really caring how loud my moans were :-)
It was around 1:30PM ish at this point and I moved back into the tub. My water still had not broken. My midwife checked me after I got back into the tub to see how far along I was. I guess she realized by the intensity and frequency of my moans that it may be getting closer to giving birth. I was 9cm dilated. I think we were all in shock that I had progressed so rapidly. My midwife told me that she was not going to rupture my bag of waters and that it should be breaking any minute. Almost instantly after that it broke and the pressure relief was absolutely amazing. It was time to push, my baby was almost here.
Everything up to this point really had honestly cruised by, but the remainder of my labor and delivery seem to pass by almost instantly as it is almost a blurr to me. I believe I pushed five times at the most. Not that I didn't enjoy being pregnant, but I really wanted Kai out of me at this point. I gave each push everything I had. I think I scared Constant because admittedly I was grunting. I remember thinking that my throat was even sore.
After the fifth push or so, Kai came out and honestly, I didn't even really know that he was all the way out. I knew something came out, but I thought maybe it was just his head. My midwife immediately grabbed him from under the water and brought him to my chest. Just like that I was a mother and our sweet baby angel, Kai James Yu was born.
Here we are just moments after birth.
Moments after birth. Our Midwife Val cleaning out Kai's lungs.
About 5-10 mins after birth...I had moved from the tub to the bed. Our Midwife Crissy is on the right.
Testing Kai's sucking abilities. We are already in love!
I'm posting this picture becuase I can't believe how swollen my face was!!!
Daddy with his little man!
Grandpa & Grandma
Kai James Yu
7lbs. 8oz20.5 Inches
8/10/10
